The Fault You Did Not Notice

Who can understand his errors? cleanse thou me from secret faults.

Psalm 19:12

Read Psalms 16 through 20. Focus on Psalm 19:7 through 14. Psalm 19 begins with the heavens declaring God's glory and moves toward the Lord's instruction illuminating human life. Its closing prayer asks about errors the speaker cannot fully discern. The person who receives light also recognizes the need for more of it. The prayer distinguishes hidden faults from presumptuous sins. Some wrong is deliberately entertained. Some has escaped our attention. Neither category is best addressed by assuming that our current self assessment is complete. Psalm 16 speaks of refuge and a received portion. Psalm 17 asks God to examine a plea. Psalm 18 remembers deliverance and strengthening. Psalm 20 places military resources beneath trust in God's name. Across the group, confidence is joined to dependence, not confidence in the perfection of one's own perception. Most of us can name a good intention more quickly than an unintended effect. We meant to help, make a joke, simplify the task, or keep things moving. When someone describes the effect differently, we repeat the intention as though it completes the explanation. But not noticing a problem is different from there being no problem. A repeated interruption may leave someone unable to finish a thought. A habit of deciding quickly may make another person's contribution impossible. We may never have intended either result. An honest response begins with curiosity rather than immediate self accusation or defense. What happened? What did the other person experience? Is there a pattern I have not seen? Asking those questions does not mean every criticism must be accepted as true. The psalmist asks God for cleansing rather than claiming perfect knowledge of the self. That is a secure enough posture to investigate. We do not have to choose between declaring ourselves faultless and accepting every possible fault someone suggests. God's instruction is called enlightening in this psalm. Let reading Scripture include the possibility that it reveals a habit you have regarded as neutral. Let a sound observation from someone else receive enough attention to test it against the facts. Then make the correction specific. “I did not intend that” can belong in the conversation, but it need not be its final sentence. You can acknowledge an effect, adjust the habit, and remain grateful that something previously hidden has become visible. Put It into Practice Ask someone affected by that habit to describe one concrete example. Check the account fairly, then change the specific behavior if the concern is sound.

Which explanation of your intention has kept you from examining the actual effect of a recurring habit?

God who gives light, reveal what I have not seen in my conduct. Keep me from defending an unintended harm only by repeating my intention. Give me sound judgment, honest correction, and willingness to keep learning. Amen.